sorry that people are sick of your majestic mcus

[socksuke_uchiha]

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Comments

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

Genuinely asking
Why do so few people want to play tops?

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

Any combination of:

- lack of confidence in directing scenes
- concerns about coming across as aggressive or predatory
- worry about being pigeonholed into the role forever
- trouble connecting with more traditionally “masculine” characters
- lack of real life sexual experience prompts anxieties about being made fun of for getting it “wrong”, safer to pillow queen

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

I was writing a long-winded comment but this hits on several of my points so I'll just build off it instead.

- it takes more energy to top than bottom, and people tend to be more lazy when given the opportunity
- people who play tops burn out faster because of it taking more energy, so that reduces their numbers driving up demand, leading to more strain on the ones still around, commence vicious cycle

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

+1 to both of these comments tbh

I love playing tops but it can get exhausting to keep running into bottoms who are enthusiastic and excited OOC but when it comes to IC they have to be "forced" into it, which gives the whole scene an uncomfortable edge since that's not usually what was negotiated

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

i don't even want my character to bottom i just want the character that is bottoming to do more than lay there like a lemon.

please. pls my back is breaking from carrying every thread.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

adding onto the "masculine characters" thing, most rpers are afab. we know what being penetrated feels like. we don't know what penetrating someone else feels like, or how to describe that. even erotica and porn tend to focus on the reactions and feelings of the penetrated person.

i would also say that wanting your character to bottom is just an extension of the usual attitude people have towards rp: we want our characters to be the focus of every scene, we want our characters to be lavished with attention, etc. it's similar to the reason people prefer to play the hurt party during hurt/comfort threads. a lot of people also enjoy "fucking up" their character, whether that means fucking them up physically, hurting them emotionally or... literally having them get fucked.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

now that you mention it, i've never actually noticed the correlation between preferring to play the 'hurt' party and the bottom and it makes so much sense. at least for my characters, the ones that play comforter 99% of the time are definitely more dominant.

if someone's character ALWAYS has to be the one getting attention (sexual or not) then i'm willing to bet they're a pillowqueen. or at least not very fun to play against.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

offshoot question -
i'm sex repulsed and haven't had any rl sexual experiences nor do i expect to. how do i learn to write smut? i feel like i'm pretty decent in the brief scenes i've written for fics but i'm afraid of being laughed out of the room if i try lmao

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

as an ace person (not sure if i'd say i'm sex repulsed, but definitely not a fan) my best recommendation is to read. not the trashy romance novel garbage, but actual literature that happens to include that sort of stuff.

unfortunately i can't think of anything exactly off the top of my head right now. :( maybe other anons can help? you could also look at the trashy romance stuff to get an idea of what will get you laughed at/what to avoid? fwiw i mean

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

Honest question. If you're sex repulsed, what's even the draw to learn and write it?

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

ignore the anon above re: avoiding the romance genre, it’s bad faith advice from someone who thinks romance isn’t “actual literature”

if you want to get better at writing those things, you SHOULD read romance. romance has a huge quality spectrum like every other genre does, but even its worst examples of sex scenes are generally above average compared to other genre because lovemaking and romance and sex are the central draw. if you wanted to learn to write mystery or horror better, you’d read mystery or horror books (regardless of quality) to figure out what you do or don’t like. It’s the same with romance. Figure out what interests you to write, what you find intriguing, what dynamics you find engaging. plenty of romance books are very light on sex because they focus more on the tension, the emotional highs/lows, the interpersonal conflicts and bonds that come out of love and lust.

and ultimately there is no one good or bad way to write smut, it’s all about figuring out what you find appealing or compelling and learning to communicate that.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

Seconding that fanfic can be a great way to go since porn-with-plot is more common, and what you'd be looking for in terms of just wanting to learn to write smut.

But also, read the threads of players you consider to be good writers. I had no idea how to write good smut at first, and then I joined a sex game and was able to follow the lead of other players. Out of everything, I'd say this helped me the most, especially since it makes sure you know how dwrp prefers to write.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

the idea that pillowqueening is easier baffles me. i find it far hard to come up with ways to *lays there* and *moans* without my writing being a broken record.

otoh the amount of moaning pillowqueens is why i don't thread smut with anyone but friends.

+1

[(Anonymous)]

same. i find that shit just as hard to write as to write from. so while im happy to use memes to find smut partners, players coming to me with bottoms have to be way more proactive or im just going to assume it's not going anywhere and will probably drop it.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

I once had a smut thread with someone who clearly thought the same and their solution was to go from insertion to climax within a single tag. my character has some good stamina so I had to either have them go at superspeed or have them go through the whole "rolling over and going to sleep now they've had theirs"

in the end I just ghosted on the thread because I realised that I didn't want to do either

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

So was this premature ejaculation or was the thread just a giant wall of thrusts before they came?

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

it's easier if you really don't give a shit about giving a good tag that carries the thread and want the other player to do everything

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

As someone who plays characters as switches, I find that when I play with a bottom, there's more focus on sensation in their tags and less action. For tops, it's the opposite. Many people tend to find it easier to write a reaction to an action, but find it hard to push an action forward. So bottoming is easier than topping.

I guess they don't like writing service tops or power bottoms, because I feel they have the same dynamic but with switched positions.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

i like writing tops a lot, most of my characters sort of lend themselves to it. i do prefer to have pretty much everyone as switches in case a hook up really calls for my character to bottom, but almost all of them lean toward topping more which is what i prefer anyway. i'm not sure why more people don't want to.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

Every time this question comes up, it's the top players responding and speaking on behalf everyone else. Almost never we get opinions from the other side. In fact, it looks like everybody is a top player, not the other way around.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

more like bottoms pillowqueen even as anons

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

i think you've cracked a code we didn't even know existed

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

i, personally, am hampered by my current roster being just a little too shy to take the lead without some prompting and encouragement at the start. it feels like the people i've run into want their character to be dominated aggressively from the get-go and that just wouldn't be IC for mine.

i play switches who enjoy being service tops. i like writing them servicing other characters and getting praised for it, and especially becoming more assertive once into the swing of things. but it can be weirdly hard finding players with the patience needed to get to that part (and it truly is not a lot, i swear).

plus, yeah, it's really exhausting to carry a thread while the other character lies there like a dead fish.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not into that dynamic. I like switches, or I guess characters that don't necessarily lean one way or the other.

Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS

[(Anonymous)]

Genuinely replying

The solution is to play switches.