rpanons | i choose to marry the triceratops

i choose to marry the triceratops

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Basically, do you consider RP partners to be friends? More specifically, do you tend to talk to previous RP partners once your threads ends or after you share a game?

I’m sort of seeing that once I leave a game and people who I talked to daily (OOC, about both fandom and RL things) no longer have active CR going, we sort of drop each other. Is this the same for most people, or am I just unlucky?

There's different levels of friendship. I have over a hundred plurk friends and speak to most of them solely through plurk or sometimes on ooc comms when we share a game. I don't remove people I get alone with after we no longer share games, but my plurk friends aren't people I speak to one on one with a lot of frequency. They're like, if this was high school, friendly faces I'd go sit next to in a classroom but probably not people I'm hanging out with after school. Not because I don't like them but because we're more casual. I would hang out if asked! But it's just not our usual situation.

People I talk to daily, like in your example, I mostly speak to on discord or in private and I continue to speak to them after we drop games or such. Some slow down on speaking as often when we don't have shared CR but I don't remove anyone I'm at that level with and I try to speak to them every few days or once a week if nothing comes up.

I think it really depends on the people involved. It takes effort to keep up a friendship when you stop sharing specific hang out times (RP, or IRL meetups) and you need to make new hang out times/activities to keep things going strong. Maybe a mini book club or watching shows together. That's been my go to.

There's different levels of friendship.

i feel like so many people forget this. there are a lot of people i rp with on a casual level and while i enjoy our cr and i like talking to them well enough, they're not people i would consider friends if rp weren't involved because we just don't have enough in common otherwise.

then i have other friends i've stayed friends with for years long after we stopped rping together because we have things in common outside of just rp and we enjoy each other's company. i've even met up with and hung out with some of them irl. they're my buds with or without rp.

sometimes people from the first group end up in the second group and sometimes they don't, but it doesn't mean i dislike them or anything like that. it just means that our friendship is one one level rather than the other.

for me it's a range. some people i'll click with and we end up talking ooc about more than just RP. when i start to get to know someone deeper than just what they play and what their fandoms are, I consider them a friend or at least a good acquaintance. For others, we play and have fun but never take that next step so I'm not that torn up if they drop away. i'll say hi and happily tag them again if we end up in a new game space together, no hard feelings and all that.

i'm usually pretty clear and direct with people about it, so that helps. if they are someone close enough to chat with ooc, i will explicitly tell them "hey, i like you and i want to stay in touch and keep talking" that way they don't have to do that dance of oh no what if they hate me. i don't. life happens and interests change, but if you're down to send memes and silly thoughts to me i'm still here for it. I like to engage in the social part of this hobby and I have made lifelong friendships in it.

rp partners are just people i rp with. i've tried making friends but i don't try anymore

I think of rp a lot like being classmates with people. You can do activities together and have fun and even share some secrets, but at the end of school, you aren't really friends. You're someone they get along with during that time but may not be interested to pursue a friendship with once you graduate. You get a few close people who may or may not be your friends until now and that's it.

That said, I have very few people O call friends in the hobby, and most of them are friendly acquaintances I would not have strong feelings about if they remove me suddenly. I have one I consider my best friend and we talk about anything and everything, others are good friends I might talk to about some things and not others. I have dropped long time friends and vice versa though sometime after a game ends because most times that's when you realize the classmate situation.

you know what? I agree with this line of thinking. it’s the healthiest way to avoid getting your feelings hurt.

the majority of my friends are people i met in rp, but the majority of people i meet in rp are not my friends.

i have a core group of friends who've met through various venues (rp and mmos) so i don't care whether i do or don't make friends in this hobby anymore

i returned to dwrp not that long ago and noticed how someone removed me from their plurk as soon as i didn't give them what they wanted. it seems socialization around these parts is fairly transactional so i didn't let it get to me

may they have better luck getting that cr from someone more amenable

look at captain humblebrag over here, who has rp partners and friends

this is so sad

fool, i'm not a person you like, you should be laughing and gloating

i'd consider most of the people i rp with as friendly acquaintances. on plurk i tend to mostly post about rp, rarely talk fandom stuff, but i like to comment on other people's rl plurks (especially pet plurks haha) and usually stay at least superficially in touch with folks even after our psl/meme threads get dropped or we no longer share a game.

i do make an effort to have an extra friendly and approachable online persona so that probably contributes to it.

sometimes when I vibe rlly well oocly with a person and at that point we might chat more often on discord or text and such. i've met a few close friends through rp (as in we'll visit each other cross country, go on vacations together, talk most days etc.) and also some just bog standard friends who might catch lunch if we're in the same geographic area and meet up at conventions and such.

RP Partners are people I tag with regularly. Friends are people who I talk to about real life stuff (theirs and mine) in a reciprocal way, even after we no longer have CR or share a game. I'm open to being friends with RP partners.

I have a discord server full of what I would consider good/close friends, I only met a couple of them (my wife and her close friend) through DWRP. Then I have my best friend who I'd die for, who I did meet through DWRP, but we haven't really played together for years.

just unlucky. i have rp partners. i have friends ive met via dwrp, and some of those friends are people ive barely ever tagged. i got lunch with a friend of mine last week who i met via dwrp, but haven't been in a game with since 2010 and never really tagged. we just ooc clicked and lived in the same area.

some of my rp partners don't really have anything in common with me once the cr ends, and others do. the classmate analogy that someone else used is how i look at it.

i think it's one of those you know if you have it. i am friendly with people i rp with, i'm casual friends with people i know the rl lives of through plurk but don't necessarily talk with all the time, and i'm friends with people who know me well and my life well and we talk regularly ooc.

there are some people who i started off rping with that became real friends and are people i still chat/do stuff with. one of them is a person id consider among my best friends and have even hung out with her irl multiple times. another i've gone on multiple international trips with and will likely do so again in the future. others i've hung out with at anime cons, sometimes roomed together.

on the flipside, one person i did psls with for two years and once called a close friend has become completely distant. what was once daily/frequent conversation pattered out into nothing once we stopped rping together. i dont think we weren't friends so much as our friendship was dependent on the rp and when that was gone so was the friendship.

this is a bit tldr but on the whole i do my best to extend a hand of friendship, because i see rp as a social hobby, and if it isnt taken then so be it.

I regard most of my social circle here as casual friends. I care about these people and wish them well, I enjoy shooting the shit when we feel like it.

I have a smaller number of rp friends who've made the jump into becoming close friends. We've met IRL and meshed well, traveled together, stayed at each others' places, talk regularly/daily, etc.

The classmate comparison is a good one. I really liked my classmates in my major, I was friendly with them, and I'd pal around with them in a heartbeat if we were working together or something similar, but for most of them we weren't tight enough to remain closely connected after graduating. I have kept up with just a few of the people I was closest to and connected with most.

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i choose to marry the triceratops

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