rpanons | i choose to marry the triceratops

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i don't really side with the idea that everyone who needs ooc chatter to start up or boost their engagement with a thread isn't actually interested in roleplaying. they just need a different ooc environment than i can personally provide.

that said, venting on rpa and answering a few comments here is something i can do for a little bit, one and done style. sustaining the energy to talk about a ship or thread daily extensively is an ongoing, long-term commitment. you're not comparing like for like.

i also think it's unfair of you to say that people in my situation aren't expressing 'basic enthusiasm,' when that's not the case at all. we're not able to do this with as much regularity as someone else might need, and both points of view are valid. sometimes people's ooc needs don't align, and it sucks, but you're better off being self aware about the situation than trying to force it. this is the 'rp woes' thread, not the 'rp fix-me's, ultimately.

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da and yeah as someone who is both a consistent tagger AND someone who likes to chatter ooc about threads and cr, i wouldn't want to tag with any of the anons in this thread because yikes. i really wonder why people participate in what is fundamentally a social hobby when it's so clear that they hate the actual social aspect of it and seem to actively resent the people who actually want to be social.

i definitely appreciate your point of view, and i think you're right to cut those boundaries for yourself! but i really want to stress, because i think it's getting lost in this thread, most of us aren't advocating for stonewalling thread partners. personally, i try to talk to mine every two-three days. but that's unfortunately never going to keep pace with someone who has the bandwidth to spend hours on discord daily back and forthing about fandom, threads or ships, and i also don't blame thread partners who need that to get their juices going. it sucks, because sometimes you can be a crazily good match in every other aspect of rp, but we each need what we need.

ngl I think someone who demands a thread partner be constantly chatting ooc about shit not related to rp is a pretty new concept, because it wasn't like this in the early dwrp days. yeah, people chatted on plurk or whatever, but I and plenty of other people kept our convos to rp only (which is all you really need imo) and had no blowback or trouble from it.

the emotionally needy types who drop you if you aren't spending hours going back and forth with them every day sound nightmarish to deal with

... it was always like this, though? every single lj/dwrp game i was in in the early 2000s had a game chatroom where people would be hanging out to shoot the shit at all hours both about rp and about anything and everything else.

the idea that you had to shoot the shit with people about non-rp topics in order to rp with them definitely wasn't, is my point. the option was there, but the hard demand for it was usually from high strung rp chihuahuas that got made fun of or avoided over it.

I never used game chatrooms and I never had anyone I played with have an issue with that or with me keeping things strictly rp related outside of polite smalltalk, and I did just fine in games.

i have a job where i already have to play social media pr a lot. i don't want to come home to more of this. it's a hobby. like yeah i don't mind interacting here and there oocly but ideally i'd like a 70/30 split between actually rping and socializing

see, i think there's a difference between ooc chatter for games and for stuff like psls. i don't tend to do much ooc chatting for games outside of close cr and i don't care if the other people aren't interested in talking much either, but for psls I would definitely lose my enthusiasm if the other player wasn't interested in talking about our threads because it's a story the two of us are writing together? it's a lot more personal and intimate than a game and so i want to be writing that kind of stuff with someone who is just as excited about it as i am.

oh yeah, I'm not a big psl person myself so I definitely only have experience w games. if it was just you and someone else, the expectation for a higher level of ooc chatter is definitely there

totally get where you're coming from but a funny counterpoint/anecdote: my best psl was one that lasted 3 years where the other player and i didn't talk ooc at all (beyond the minimum administrative stuff like who would write the starter). we eventually became friends after that psl ended and now talk about non-rp stuff every day lol

i had a six-year one like that, worked like a charm. we didn't even pass starter ideas by each other, just honor system that if i started last time, you do this time, and check-in of "hey, that thread looks wrapped, shall i start another?" i think i broke pattern and let them know i was unavailable for a few days (we tagged multiple times a day so they'd notice) a few times, that was it. sometimes you just vibe with someone's energy ig.

i choose to marry the triceratops

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