rpanons | but my main character syndrome

but my main character syndrome

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Eeehhh on the one hand no one is entitled to play in a game, mods should have the right to pick and choose who gets in, whether that be based on invites or friends

Oh the other hand…

Yeah, I can see how it sucks knowing that you’re not wanted or popular. Honestly, it’s probably not even that you’re not liked enough by others, but that you’re not engaging enough on plurk and have difficulty speaking up or making internet friends.

Just know that it’s not you, it’s who you know, kind of like life itself. Contrary to what some anons mention here, there are controversial players in some of these private, curated games. My recommendation is to try to reach out to others, tag around the TDMs to secure an invite, be engaging, or message the mods directly of how excited you would be to try playing in their game. Enthusiasm is flattering, and it goes a long way.

i have never had an issue asking the mods for an invite. i'm just an average dwrper.

if you're deterred by simply asking then the filter is working, sorry to say it.

this is it

That last sentence. Is it so hard not to put people down? What do you get out of commenting like that?

It's like nobody here is capable of leaving a pleasant comment. You could have just left it at the positive "it's possible to get invites by asking" but no, you have add "sorry to say...".

da but if someone is too anxious to even try pming the mods of a game to see if they will give out an invite, that's not a good sign. ime that's exactly the sort of person who becomes an intolerable anxiety chihuahua if someone is tagging someone else faster than them, if they don't get a lot of tag-ins on their post, etc.

wow if this is the attitude of people in invite-only games, maybe you dodged a bullet op.

ftr im with them on "you should just ask" part, but equating people with some self-esteem issues and not thinking they're good enough (which lbr is a lot of folks in dwrp) to those of "anxiety chihuahua" level is yikes. no harm in being a little more empathetic, okay?

OP, it's normal to feel left out. this is a social kind of setting, and most here aren't dicks or gatekeepers. so don't let that get to you and prevent you from asking. if they do accept you in, congrats. if they don't want you, that's okay too, and move on.

lol i don't even play in invite-only games. but if i saw one that looked interesting, i would pm the mods and explain that i saw the game and thought it looked cool and was wondering if it would be possible to get an invite because it costs me exactly nothing to give it a try. if they say no, they say no, but they might also say yes. i don't have any right to be bummed about the game being invite-only if i haven't even asked to see if they would let me in.

They're going to be more common. Ppl need to get used to asking if they're really interested and being okay if the answer is no. 99% of the time if you're a normal dwrper though the answer will be yes.

ayrt and exactly, and even if you get a 'no' it's not like it's some sort of personal affront because it's probably just something as simple as the mods only wanting to let in people that they or the players in the game know.

ayrt

this is probably where we differ. i think if someone feels disappointed, left out, or anxious, it's okay to acknowledge those feelings. we are entitled to how we feel. what they do with their feelings, whether they get the courage to ask or not, is up to them, but i'm always okay with encouraging someone, and okay with people expressing that they feel anxious or bummed. they might just need a little push! we aren't entitled to join a game that declines them, though, or entitled to think they'll be accepted 100% of the time, or that mods will somehow read their mind. i'm not sure why it's so difficult to understand this?

i've seen for some invite only games where they state to not ask in their rules. since i've been out of this so long, is it generally okay to ask? with the understanding you're unlikely to get in? i thought this would be a huge no-no.

If they say don't ask then

Don't ask

sorry, let me clarify - i meant in general if there's no rule stating to not ask. i took it as a general blanket across all games after i read a few saying the same thing. obviously i'm not gonna request something that's against the rules. i just thought it was an unwritten one for all invite only games like that.

if there's no rule saying not to ask then it never hurts to try.

i'm planning on running a private game at some point in the future and honestly if someone was interested enough in the premise to pm me and ask if they could get an invite, i would likely say yes.

thanks anon! i appreciate it. i remember all the norms from dw awhile ago but i don't know the new ones and i'm trying not to step on toes. i'll keep this in mind.

da: a private game to me implies the mod only wants to play with the people they know, it wouldn't occur to me to ask a stranger to let me in to a private event. I would have assumed asking out of the blue would be a huge faux-pas, I'm surprised everyone is so casually recommending it.

"private" or invite only games that welcome PM requests for an invite make that very clear on their tdm and/or faq. if you haven't noticed that games like this exist now then you probably aren't paying attention. folkmore and metaheroes aren't a well kept secret

i feel like anyone afraid to ask for an invite hasn't even looked at most game info pages to see if there's a "ask for an invite if you don't know anyone" sentence right there for them. most invite/private games make it very clear on what degree of private they are.

I actually didn't realize either of those two needed an invite, I thought they were public games. Well, Folkmore anyway, I thought Metaheroes was a dressing-room.

tbh at this point i think we (collectively) need to strengthen our terms a bit better? here's how i see them:

public game = game anyone can apply. mods CAN and SHOULD pre-ban people they don't want but this is rare and usually disclosed. some games have player caps or closed app cycles. they have high public visibility, are advertised on rpa, emp, plurk, etc.

invite only = game that requires an invite before you can app. usually it is okay to ask the mods directly for an invite if you don't know anyone (unless otherwise stated in game info). some games have "open" cycles that allow anyone in for a short period without an invite. some games have "closed" periods or caps. mods CAN and more freely DO pre-ban people they don't want, but this is still uncommon. these have low to moderate visibility, are sometimes advertised on rpa but more commonly spread via word of mouth on plurk.

private game = an invite-only game with low to no visibility, usually a small game for a mod and their friends specifically. usually it is not okay to ask unless you know someone or stated otherwise in game info.

I like these definitions, this is basically how I think of these games. Some private games are invite only, but not all invite only games are private, which imo is what games like Folkmore are.

agree with you and idk what's going on right now, it's like people think they're somehow helping by being negative while also decrying negativity

The only way I would ever run a game would be if it were small, private, and for friends I trust, but tbh the reaction to people simply saying they’re disappointed a lot of games are going private and they don't know where to start with finding info on these games and getting into them is kind of ugly. No mods are being imposed on by a few comments sadfacing on rpanons.

ma'am this is a wendy's

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but my main character syndrome

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