rpanons | Everything is under control

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Concerns?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It is perfectly all right for you two to be unhappy with your friend being wanked on, it's okay for you guys to tell anons to use an HMD when one is clearly available for critting her, and it's fine for you to ask for evidence for crit that anons have made.

What is not okay is to give anons who like wank stirring exactly what they wanted when they started this thread and do it in the name of your friend. Anons who like wank love confrontation of an angry nature in particular and that is exactly what you're giving these anons. You are, essentially, feeding them. They don't care about the points you're making at all, no matter how valid they are, because the way you're making your points is what they're more interested in. You are fighting them with while clearly upset and they LOVE that.

What this means to these same anons is that while you're arguing upset you are going to keep arguing while upset and give them more to work with. You really need to understand that if you address these kinds of anons calmly they tend to dissipate because there's nothing left for them to screw around with.

Also, yes, this does make your friend look bad in a few ways because her not addressing this problem will unfortunately, and probably unfairly (I don't know Amanda so I can't say for sure), will make it seem like the criticism against her is more valid since she's not saying anyone is wrong in what they're thinking about her. It's seen as an admission that she knows she's messing up and can't argue against it since there's no argument for her to make. Again, this is pretty unfair, but that's the way it's seen. Also, you two reacting with vitriol that's not well thought out and presented properly will just remind people of big name wankers whose friends go out to defend them with the intent to just hurt whoever is attacking their friend instead of addressing any real problems or concerns that someone has come up with. And insulting people with complaints won't make them feel like they should be on your side. Yeah, there are jerks in here, but anyone else who wasn't a jerk who also agrees with anon's point but has yet to give crit on the HMD (and there are a lot of reasons they might not have) may also feel insulted and will feel like hey maybe Amanda deserves some of this because her friends are being jerks too. And you know what? It is absolutely not cool of you to make your friend look worse than they are.

You can defend her, but the way you're doing it is going to just keep causing problems.

Thank you.

Here's my question for you: Were you unaware this was happening until afterwards? I mean, I really doubt you sent them in to whiteknight for you, but did someone bring this to your attention later and then you found out that holy shit, two of your friends were plastering themselves all over this thread and making things ten times worse?

Because if that's how it happened, oh my god I feel so sorry for you. I would be so angry.

I was aware of the thread up to Karkat's first reply and the slew of anon replies after, but I ended up falling asleep after that, so ... I wasn't aware of any of the other comments until I had woken up.

I was ... honestly quietly sighing over the fact this had doubled while I was asleep. :(

edit because I cant finish typing: I was going to send a reply in with just a link to my hmd, but like I said, I was really really tired last night and I just passed out before I could do anything.

Edited 2012-03-03 01:57 (UTC)

I think they finally figured it out, but this needed to be said anyway.

Everything is under control

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