may our quest for daddys be fruitful

[socksuke_uchiha]

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Comments

+1

[(Anonymous)]

I am also very baffled by this thread and the fact that some of these responses have gone as far as to say the other player should have the final decision on how your character feels about theirs.

Re: +1

[(Anonymous)]

it's not about letting other people decide how your character feels about theirs, anon, it's about YOU controlling how your character feels in order to respect the other player's wishes not to pursue certain types of plots with yours. we do this all the time in order to be respectful of our rp partners. maybe your partner doesn't want to play x type of negative cr, or y type of kink in a sex game, so you simply don't pursue that angle in the thread. It's basic courtesy in a collaborative hobby.

if you and others responding to ayrt think you should have the right to play out your character having an unrequited crush on another person's character regardless of how they feel, cool, you're allowed to think that. I don't like playing that cr out with people I don't know, especially if they have the attitude that I'm not allowed to decline that cr because they ~can't control the muse~, so I'm probably going to ask you not to tag me.

I know this may come as a shock, but "it's ic for my character, so I'm going to do it" is also an excuse ship-pushers use to try and twist arms to get their way, so there's a reason people are gun-shy about this.

na

[(Anonymous)]

anon, i think you're mixing two different points there

"I don't like playing that cr out with people I don't know"

but nobody is saying you're obliged to. a character having a crush on yours doesn't mean it's something your character is going to interact with. that's why a couple of people in this thread said it depends on how the tag goes. if the character is going to talk about it and/or let it come up in their actions so your chara must react, even if it's without expecting the ship, then yeah, that should be checked on first, because like you said that would be bringing the other person into a specific plot. but if it's only a couple of lines in narration... why should you check on the other person first to describe your character's thoughts?

you brought up negative cr as if it was an obvious example and wow no, if your character tags mine's network post and my character doesn't like the answer, i'm not gonna pm you first to say "hey look my character didn't like that tag". i'd check with you first if, for example, they were a violent ass that wanted to start a fight. but i wouldn't -and i don't know anyone that would- pm first just because my tag would say "[Wow, that's a very stupid idea. John can't believe this guy is actually serious. What a dumbass.]"

nobody gets to decide how another person's character feels, which is what ayrt is trying to say. go to op's comment and change it to literally any other emotion. "Should you let people know before your character starts hating on theirs?" "Should you let people know before your character starts feeling protective of theirs?" etc. everyone would've said it's a stupid question.

this anon
https://rpanons.dreamwidth.org/85375.html?thread=256606335#cmt256606335
gave the best example of what's cool and what's not. and in fact, i wish we could have more tags like the first one.

we have developed in dwrp some stupid kneejerk reaction to anything shipping related. we only do serious shipping or nothing. we play tons of attractive characters and we never write tags that have just ONE line of our characters reacting to how hot Thor is IN NARRATION before replying to the conversation normally. it's like if we aren't writing shipping then the tag must be 100% GEN NO ICKY FEELINGS ALLOWED.

characters that are thirsty in canon usually get a pass but everyone else? it's like nobody feels casual attraction, everyone is a robot until two players decide they're going to ship them. we don't do this with ANY OTHER emotion.

da

[(Anonymous)]

I get what you're saying anon but at the same time, it's a simple thing to check. like a single message saying "hey my character is crushing on yours, is that cool?" isn't difficult

it's okay if you don't think your character should be ~controlled but this is a collaborative hobby and honestly the lengths people will go to in order to never collaborate with anyone is what causes problems, not someone not being able to play out their thirst

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

but why should we check on this when we literally don't check on anything else? if someone came here to say "my character got a tag that called him a dumbass and the player didn't check with me first" everyone would call op a tittybaby because they can't accept their character not being liked by everyone.

i'm always around here saying "just pm and ask" and i like encouraging communication, but the double standards we have in this subject matter is beyond dumb.

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

anon, it's not a double standard when - like you just pointed out - shipping is a big deal for a lot of people. having a character get angry at yours isn't usually a big deal because most of the time it's an expected response (the character is being a dumbass or is a jerk or has done something stupid), but when someone wants a ship or whatever out of nowhere, that often causes drama and hurt feelings.

it's much easier to have miscommunication over something like a crush than just being insulted. if someone's giving me crush-y introspection in a tag I might sit there and think, "wait, should I reciprocate? do they want to take this somewhere? will my character be seen as a dick if I turn them down? is this going to change our cr?"

ALL of that can be avoided if you just check in and ask or figure out a little arc for it. and it will be more fun for both parties.

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

> if someone's giving me crush-y introspection in a tag I might sit there and think, "wait, should I reciprocate? do they want to take this somewhere? will my character be seen as a dick if I turn them down? is this going to change our cr?"

WTF?? no? why are you thinking how to react to introspection? there's nothing for you character to turn down! it's INTROSPECTION.

SEE this is what i mean, i bet you wouldn't having those thoughts about other kinds of narration because you know narration is just that, narration. but the minute it becomes about shipping it becomes weird for some reason

if (general) you were having those thoughts about my characters negative introspection we would be calling you out for lack of ic/divide

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

uh yes I am going to think about introspection if it's an indicator of how the character is going to act around mine. unless that character is acting in complete opposite to their actual feelings at all times, they're probably going to start flirting. I would never address things my character isn't aware of but as a player I am going to sit and think about storylines or whatever that might be happening here

idk why you're assuming so much about how I'd deal with negative introspection or whatever, because if someone wants to develop negative cr I'd also prefer communication so we can both create a plot that we're both going to enjoy from that as well

in ANY instance of a character relationship changing or becoming more significant than idk getting coffee or whatever, of course it's better to discuss it, because it makes the rp -- gasp -- more fun.

why are you trying to dig for so many excuses not to talk to your thread partners, anon?

Re: ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

anon, narration influences how your character acts around other characters and how other players will respond. how do you even rp? what the heck? introspection matters. do you just completely ignore the rest of the tag? man even people respond to [moans]

it is really not that difficult to communicate with the other player and ask them if you are both moving towards the same goal, whether that be for a crush (reciprocated or not) or negative cr or literally ANYTHING ELSE just to avoid a lot of mishaps in the future that can easily be solved just with a simple message to the other person, and guess what, that's also how you potentially avoid any ic/ooc divide. JUST TALK TO THEM

da

[(Anonymous)]

This goes back to a previous discussion where some RPers use introspection as a way to test out the waters for future plotting. Some players do this, some do not and think it's annoying. This is just a specific (to ship or just to crush) subset of that behaviour, so I'd argue that this isn't an isolated behaviour just for fears of shipping.

Maybe an easier solution would be for people who do not want to play out crush-realization threads to put that in their permissions posts in their character's journal. Presuming players read one another's permissions, it might give you (airt) a heads-up that that particular character isn't one that you should drop casual crush-based introspection for, because the other player's style probably isn't going to mesh with yours on that front.

Permissions posts were created as a half-way point between players who want to connect and plan things and those who really don't, for whatever reason. If crushing = ship-pushing red flags to you (ayrt who is leery of crush comments), please add some note to your permissions that is clear on a skim-through.

And if you like playing off the cuff and dropping crush introspection (airt), but notice other players have marked that as a boundary, save the crush comments for other characters.

+1

[(Anonymous)]

if someone has to inbox you or keep plurk open to check in about every passing feeling my character has about yours, you're making this community collectively less fun to be in. some ppl are way too precious about this shit.

Re: +1

[(Anonymous)]

love how you interpret "check in when something important is going on" as being bothered by someone talking to you

telling people they're "less fun" when they communicate is some bullshit given how much wank in this hobby is because of people assuming stuff instead of talking about it

Re: +1

[(Anonymous)]

i think you've got the pronouns all mixed up, but whatever makes this argument work for you i guess.

if you go crying to RPA or WG because someone's prose mentions feelings about your character you didn't explicitly condone ooc i hope you stop playing here.

Re: na

[(Anonymous)]

Anon, this isn't about one or two lines in narration where a character goes "oh, he's hot," or a one-off mean comment on a network post. op's specific wording was "should you let people know before your character develops a crush on theirs?" That implies a level of cr development and an ongoing plot in which the player has decided they want their character to realize a crush on the other character. That means it's going to come up repeatedly and that potentially, A's crush is going to change the way A interacts with B. If B's player doesn't want to deal with that being an ongoing element of their CR, they should be allowed to opt out of it.

If you still don't think you should have to give them a polite heads up about something ongoing like that - okay? You're allowed, go for it. But don't be mad if the other player reaches out then and says, hey, this crush plot isn't something I want to play out, can we not?

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

>That implies a level of cr development and an ongoing plot in which the player has decided they want their character to realize a crush on the other character. That means it's going to come up repeatedly and that potentially, A's crush is going to change the way A interacts with B.

no, that's just you assuming a bunch of stuff. see how other anons did not do that and replied "hey it depends on how you pull it on the tag". because yeah everyone agrees that if it's going to drag the other player into a specific plot then yeah, that should always be checked on first.

but mere feelings in narration? be positive or negative? nah.

Re: ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

Multiple other people clearly got the impression this meant an ongoing thing because the word "develops" is right there in the sentence, but I can see you're hellbent on trying to frame anyone who wants basic communication and the ability to opt out as hysterical, so meh

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

we wouldn't be asking for the "ability to opt out" for any other emotion before it happens.

da

[(Anonymous)]

clearly you've never experienced someone dumping negative introspectio and angry cr on you out of nowhere

how do you fix these problems?

TALK. TO. YOUR. THREAD. PARTNERS.

god, why is that so controversial

Re: ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

the op literally said they want to have the character develop a crush. this isn't a moment of thirst, it's pretty clearly about having an ongoing thing.

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

ok, but even then, who is saying it will go beyond narration?

and would all of you be reacting the same if op had said they wanted their character to develop hatred towards another?

again, replace it with literally any other emotion and think about how stupid it sounds

Re: ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

why are you telling people not to assume things when you're the one assuming it won't go beyond narration?

hmm how would you figure out what's really going on I wonder

[(Anonymous)]

jfc the shit in this thread is exactly how we had drama like that thousand-thread cheating wank on wg, isn't it

big yikes at the number of people in this thread having the exact same allergy to the idea of basic ooc communication

[(Anonymous)]

no, don't mix those subjects, because you're gonna put the attention where it doesn't belong again. the problem with that thread was someone breaking an agreement. communication had already happened, boundaries had already been established, and then the player shat on that. the agreement being about shipping is secondary, it could've been about anything else.

+1

[(Anonymous)]

this anon should go back a couple of pages and read those threads about how some people in dwrp aren't here to chat ooc. if they are, great. go nuts. but don't expect a ton of ooc contact from everyone. some people just want to play. if you need to be handheld about everything some people here aren't going to want your cr and they're not the bad guy for it.

Re: +1

[(Anonymous)]

ok

some people don't want unrequited feelings introduced into their cr at all, or without a heads up first. if that's how you roll, some people aren't going to want your cr, and they're not the bad guys for it