[moans]

[socksuke_uchiha]

Rundown: rpanons is an anonymous community for role-play related topics. This place serves as a forum for game discussions, canon discussions, RP solicitations (ATP, game ads, open memes), and advice. The occasional off topic comment is inevitable, but please keep heated social and political topics to their respective communities. Posting them here will only get them frozen. Subsequent threads made to bypass a freeze will then be deleted.

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Comments

[(Anonymous)]

a player who you’ve never interacted before, but whom you’re deeply uncomfortable with based on how you’ve seen them conduct themselves on memes and on their character journal, apps into your game. you’ve already resolved not to play with them, but worry about running into situations where you might be approached for plotting. do you:

A) go to their HMD and politely state that you’re opting out of playing with them (knowing that they might kick off over it because they seem like an unstable person)
B) ban their journal without saying anything so that they won’t be able to reply to your posts/comments (potentially causing drama down the line if they realise, but it probably won’t matter to you because you’ll have what you want which is non-interaction)
C) do nothing and just ignore them if they comment to your posts or toplevels

[(Anonymous)]

I would do c because usually with people like this I acknowledge that they might be annoying but ultimately the fact that they make me uncomfortable is my problem, not theirs.

my rule of thumb with this stuff is usually "can I give this person constructive criticism about what they're doing?". if the answer is "no, because it's just their personality", then it's not worth trying to engage.

[(Anonymous)]

A.

If they're that unstable and they comment to my posts or toplevels, chances are they're going to kick off about being ignored. If I do A and they kick-off in response to my request, I can go to the mods and give them a heads-up about their conduct.

[(Anonymous)]

D) do nothing until they approach you first, which probably won't happen anyway. chill out, rp is not this big a deal

+1

[(Anonymous)]

[(Anonymous)]

iirc you can only ban people from commenting on your journal, not your posts to dreamwidth communities. this makes banning the most useless option, because they'll only notice if they try to PM you or reply to a journal post (hmd, permissions, etc) before tagging you or talking to you on the ooc comm.

anyway i'd go with c or a depending on just how uncomfortable they make me or how likely i think it is that they'll tag my character.

[(Anonymous)]

sa i misread option c. if they did tag me then i'd send them some kind of "thanks, but no thanks" message.

[(Anonymous)]

B won't even work in comm based games. Banning only prevents them from commenting on posts in your journal and we don't have any more journal based games.

I'd either do A or wait until they show interest and then advise I'd prefer not to be tagged by them.

[(Anonymous)]

Feels like you're going to get drama either way, anon....

B seems like it's going to blow up in your face and C too, honestly. maybe something like A. "Hi there! Welcome to the game. I'm just dropping a note here to tell you that I'd prefer to opt-out of cr with this character." that way it doesn't sound like a personal attack.

+100

[(Anonymous)]

Make it about the character, not the player.

Re: +100

[(Anonymous)]

I honestly disagree. If you make it about the character, then you have to do it again if the player apps more characters. If it is just the character you don't want to interact with, that's fine. But if it's the player you have an issue with then don't make it sound like it's just the character and they could play with you if they app someone else.

[(Anonymous)]

D) do nothing and if they end up approaching me then say "no thank you"

+1

[(Anonymous)]

there's no reason to do anything unless they actually approach you for cr. they might not. if they do, just politely state that you aren't interested. simple as that.

+1

[(Anonymous)]

The fact that OP didnt even consider this option makes me think they're one of those people that's constantly surrounded by drama and just can't figure out why.

Re: +1

[(Anonymous)]

mte. they seem to be champing at the bit to turn this into an issue when chances are good the person won't even tag them at all.

Re: +1

[(Anonymous)]

you mean.......what option C was

+1

[(Anonymous)]

This is the correct answer.

It doesn't make a thing out of it if it doesn't need to, but it's straightforward the moment the need arises.

[(Anonymous)]

the replies to this are so indicative of the way dwrpers, culturally, will talk themselves out of direct communication nine times out of ten.

a, anon. the obvious answer is fucking a. whether you proactively approach them to do it, or you wait until they've contacted you, the answer is a. b and c shouldn't even be considered.

-1

[(Anonymous)]

this reply is indicative of how some cultures can't get over the idea that everyone needs to hear their opinion all of the time, whether the other party has asked for it or not. if nobody is getting hurt and all OP wants is to continue to not have to engage to this person, then not engaging with them is an appropriate answer, especially if OP is right at direct engagement will end up hurting more people than it helps.

[(Anonymous)]

communication is great IF there's a situation. but op is freaking out about the possibility of being approached by this person, which is stupid. there's no issue yet. there's nothing to communicate.

it's like, you see a weather report saying it MIGHT rain. you wonder if you should bring an umbrella or take your car or wear a jacket, while at the same time disregarding the option of just staying home.

[(Anonymous)]

direct communication does not mean walking up to somebody unprompted to say whatever's on your mind. it means being straightforward and clear in the context of an existing interaction.

fucking hell i swear the people who whine about dwrpers being bad at communication tend to be completely socially inept 9 times out of 10.

[(Anonymous)]

lol

OP

[(Anonymous)]

troy walking into flaming room with pizza.gif

So, uh, thanks for the people who gave reasonable insights, I’m going to hold off on contacting the player unless they interact with me first. The rest of you...have fun making yourselves look crazier and more invested in the argument over this thread than *I am* over the original issue

Re: OP

[(Anonymous)]

my best advice: if your game has a randomized event that you want to play in and that player signs up for it, be sure to pm your mods and let them know you do not want to be partnered with that player.

[(Anonymous)]

Depends on how likely it is that they'll reach out to me. Castmates? Definitely A. Characters have nothing to do with each other, nothing in common, and no real reason to interact? Probably leave it until/unless they comment at me, in which case loop back to A.

B is just stupid. C starts out fine but if they actually tag you, you should tell them you don't wanna tag back instead of ghosting.