rpanons | don't be jelly i was a handmaiden of satan in another life

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i live with someone who just got a bird and he keeps whistling at it. i want to kill them both. tips?

i just heard my mom scream, "YOU'RE TOO LOUD!" so i may have an accomplice.

as a bird owner, screaming at birds just makes them louder because they interpret it as you being excited with them

have fun

the bird's been quiet. it never actually responds to the whistling, but he does it anyway for minutes at a time.

da but the solution is simple:

feed the bird to a cat

or leave a window open i guess

good tips. thank you, anon

cool, another person who doesn't give a shit about their living arrangement and the fact that birds are fucking loud, always, for their entire lives, which is usually decades, and they require tons of attention especially if it's a single bird. if not, it will likely scream to itself constantly and pluck its feathers out to cure its boredom. hope your roommate works from home!

i give it a couple months before it's given away.

did you just respond seriously to an obvious troll post

how is it an obvious troll post? the "i'm a murderer part" obviously is but there's plenty of shitty people who buy cockatiels because they're cute then decide to just leave them outside somewhere to be someone else's problem because they realize they're very loud and very needy. idk where you live but this happens all the time around me

why would you assume *anyone* in this sub-thread would be sincere?

because the anon who mentioned the bird seems legit? if they're trolling it's a pretty bad troll because it's not like they're saying anything particularly trolly

why would anyone respond legitimately to a post saying "I'M A MURDERER ASK ME ANYTHING"?

Re: Murderer

(Anonymous) - 2019-05-17 02:12 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) - 2019-05-17 02:14 (UTC) - Expand

ok betty but nobody asked you for your opinions on birdcare in this thread that's literally jokes all the way down

or are you going to wig out over the anon agreeing to feed the bird to a cat now

make your own super serious subthread about your expertise in birds or something lmao

this is i dont like chips rly taken to a joyless extreme smh

"joyless extreme" what

it doesn't bother you that someone bought an animal with apparently no real intention of caring for it properly, bc the anon and the mom hate it, and the bird also wasn't given a partner (which is recommended bc parrots in particular get very lonely and need socialization)??

that's just. sad to me. i guess if you don't give a shit about pet welfare then it's funny or edgy or something but ok anon

the bird would live a better life just being eaten at this point instead of in a house where everyone hates it except the person who bought it, who apparently didn't get it a friend

i guess pet neglect really is a funny thing to joke about here

the guy has had birds before. he's not going to get rid of it. i just heard his stupid whistling when i saw the joke comment and posted with one of my own. all is well

ok. sorry i freaked out, i've just seen a lot of abandoned pets and esp birds in my life and it made me sad. i'm glad i was overreacting

(Anonymous) - 2019-05-17 02:16 (UTC) - Expand

im dying squirtle

pet neglect is funny

pls

This whole thread just makes me nostalgic for the chocolate fountain cgi bird wank.

NO REAL BIRD WOULD WALK DIRECTLY INTO WATER

is this the weird drunken cousin of PIGEONS CAN HEAR MOUNTAINS or what's going on here

Listen here cum-slut.

don't be jelly i was a handmaiden of satan in another life

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