You sound fat

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Comments

[(Anonymous)]

why does anyone need a space to discuss something they aren't doing

no one has ever explained this to me

[(Anonymous)]

they like to pretend they have it just as bad as the icky gays.

just like bisexuals like to pretend they are invisible.

[(Anonymous)]

bisexuals aren't invisible. they get shit from both sides. not sure what world you live in.

[(Anonymous)]

the one were we have a national bisexual visibility day?

da

[(Anonymous)]

well if we have a whole day devoted to bisexual visibility then clearly all problems are solved

Re: da

[(Anonymous)]

flatviewer needs to parent up

[(Anonymous)]

do you think gay spaces are nothing but talking about gay sex

[(Anonymous)]

of course not but there's more to being gay than just sex

is there more to being asexual than just not being interested in sex? genuine question, is there?

[(Anonymous)]

the more to being gay there is is due to a century of developing culture since gay became an identity. ace has been an identity for MAYBE twenty years. if there's no more to being asexual (i'm not ace, i don't know if there is or not), it's because the identity (if not the trait) is still brand new.

[(Anonymous)]

There can be, depending. I know a lot of ace people are still trying to understand they're, say, not broken for not feeling sexual attraction and dealing with that message flung at them. In that case, ace spaces would be great for support--kind of like how gay kids have spaces where they can get support about how they're not, you know, hellbound.

[(Anonymous)]

why is being called broken this big a deal to people though?

as an empirical matter, it is unusual for a person to lack a sense of sexual desire. "broken" is a rude-ass way to put it, but that's all it is. it's not traumatic unless you're a total baby. it's just somebody being a rude little fuck.

calling a gay person hellbound is a moral accusation and turns their orientation into something punishable. being called "broken" does no such thing. "you're weird" isn't the same as "you're an amoral piece of shit who ought to suffer eternally for the way you were born". idg why you'd need a space to console yourself for being called weird unless you're basically too fragile to live.

[(Anonymous)]

this entire argument is predicted on the assumption that weird and broken are the same thing, and they very very much are not.

[(Anonymous)]

not generally, but in this context, yes they are. the idea that asexual = broken rests entirely on the notion that it's unusual and possibly a medical issue if you don't want to fuck anybody. it's a rude, usually mistaken assumption that's ultimately nobody's business but the asexual person's, but that's how rude, nosy people see it. person lacking a function = person not functioning in the way other people function. person not functioning in the way other people function = strange person.

[(Anonymous)]

it's not about people calling them broken, though. it's about coming to the conclusion that they are broken, which is a fairly universal experience for ace people before they discover asexuality. it's not even about rude, nosy people, because it's obviously a lot bigger than a few assholes.

[(Anonymous)]

that's even dumber lol. if it's not about rude, nosy people and it's a conclusion you reached on your own, then how is it sort of like gay kids being told they're hellbound? no gay kid arrives at the specific conclusion that they're hellbound without being told so.

and if you reached the conclusion that you're broken only to find out that asexuality is a thing that exists, then why would this require a whole support space? the only reaction this merits is "oh that's a real thing? cool i thought i was buggin' or something. anyways"

[(Anonymous)]

you're stupid, you're ugly, and you're fat aren't moral accusations either

but people get hurt by those all the time, so i guess they're also too fragile to live by your standards

[(Anonymous)]

stupid people and ugly people haven't tried to carve out exclusive spaces to try and console each other through an imaginary shared culture of stupidity and ugliness. fat is sorta different imo because some people actually do associate fatness with gluttony and gluttony with morality which is dumb and also rude.

[(Anonymous)]

actually, plenty of people would argue that menally disabled communities have done just that

[(Anonymous)]

those people are stupid and ugly

[(Anonymous)]

Fat acceptance movement.

[(Anonymous)]

I know for me, awhile back, I sought out an asexual community because there was a period of time where all of my closest friends (15+ years of friendship) were getting into serious romantic relationships and I was sad and lonely. While I'm not interested in romance/sex, I also don't really want to live alone for the rest of my life either. Unfortunately, it's kind of hard to find a platonic life partner when you don't actually know anyone else who would be into that. (Is there an EHarmony for that?)

Honestly, I don't really participate much in ~asexual discourse~, I don't consider myself persecuted or anything, and, being physically disabled since birth, I don't really care about being broken or different or whatever, but at that point in time, I was really glad to find a group of people who have similar experiences and life goals.

Not sure if that answers your question, but I think it's just the same as any other group of people looking for like-minded individuals.

[(Anonymous)]

this me

[(Anonymous)]

When gay spaces are just about how gay we are and how much gay sex we want, then you'll have a point

Otherwise, yeah, no, I'm all for my asexual friends having spaces where they can reassure each other without anyone butting in that they aren't fucking broken for not feeling sexual attraction

[(Anonymous)]

you only needed to say that once ya know

[(Anonymous)]

I did. Just because other people have the same opinion doesn't make us the same anon.