rpanons | I got tinglies

Rundown:

rpanons is an anonymous community for role-play related topics. This place serves as a forum for game discussions, canon discussions, RP solicitations (ATP, game ads, open memes), and advice. The occasional off topic comment is inevitable, but please keep heated social and political topics to their respective communities. Posting them here will only get them frozen. Subsequent threads made to bypass a freeze will then be deleted.

Rules:

Do not post pornographic or shocking images.
Do not share private entries, plurks, chat logs, etc.
Do not use this community as your social/political/hatespeech soapbox.
Do not be redundant. One page does not need three or more threads on one topic/theme.
Do not treat this comm like your personal Plurk or Twitter. Off-topic happens, but it should be open for discussion and not just a play-by-play of your life. No one cares.

CONCERNS | RESOURCES

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I'm really sorry if we've made anyone feel uncomfortable. We really aren't trying to make excuses for abusive relationships, or say that it's "okay because of issues" - because that would be terrible. As far as I'm concerned, I see it as an unhealthy, codependent relationship which probably should have ended if it wasn't for the fact that they both feel like they need the other, and that they don't deserve better. That doesn't make it okay, or right, and doesn't change the fact that it is abusive.

But as a person who has been in an unhealthy, codependent relationship myself, one which should have been put an end to long before it violently crashed, I think I can safely say that when you're on the inside of a relationship like that... you don't always get it. You don't see just how incredibly messed up you and your partner are, how much you enable each other, and how bad you are for each other. You only see how much you're "needed", and how much you think you need the other.

That is what I've been trying to portray, but obviously I have failed fundamentally if it makes people think that that I'm trying to glorify unhealthy relationships, or indicate that it's okay for Fai to be treated badly because his boyfriend has issues. So I would like to apologize profoundly for that, and from now on I will endeavor to handle things better, because the last thing I want to do is to make people feel uncomfortable in their rp environment.

Thank you for bringing this to my attention, nonnies.

i'm glad to see that you're taking this well and i hope you will follow up with what you've said.

personally though, it's not just the ooc attitude to the relationship that's been bothering me, but the abusive aspects of it as well. now i don't want to tell either of you that you should give up your ship but i would still suggest that you tone it down ic.

just because it's something that can happen irl doesn't mean that you should always duplicate it in rp. And this is a game not a private muse box which means it's going to affect a lot of other people as well.

Of course, since this is a game and not a musebox, I realize that we don't live in a bubble. However, I do feel as if it is not something your character should know - and since almost all of their interactions happens in private, the only one who might end up in this category is Yuui - then you have a certain responsibility for what you choose to read. If it makes you uncomfortable, and if your character doesn't have to know about it, then may I suggest that you don't read it?

I am really not trying to come across as bitchy, but we are playing two very emotionally unhealthy youths in a relationship, and that means that the relationship in itself will be unhealthy. And while we don't have to play it out, admittedly, I have seen nothing in the rules which suggest that an abusive relationship is something we're not allowed to play out.

Not totally sure if this will help, but... isn't the point of RP to be as true to the characters as you can be? Lovino is an abusive character in canon. Hell, he strangles his brother for making friends with Germans, and it's normal enough that Feliciano doesn't even mention it afterward. He's been pushing people around since he was eight, at least. And actually, as far as I knew I was already toning him down since... you know he doesn't go through with most of his threats. Obviously, it's not okay just because he's got issues. He's got a lot of issues and they are the direct reason for how he treats others, that doesn't mean it's okay. It means he has to find something that'll work out for him so he can stop hurting people, just like a regular kid.

Another point: He's a teenager. He's going to react to things illogically and violently, because he was raised believing that whatever he wants is exactly what he will get. I'm all for it if he can get some IC help for that, and I'm personally pretty happy with the fact that he's improving, little by little. But I'm honestly not really impressed with pretending that he's a good person. He's not. He's a paranoid, self-centered little asshole and unless someone can show him how to express himself positively, he will continue to be a paranoid, self-centered little asshole.

I'm sorry if this comes off as "screw you I do what I want", that's the opposite of what I'm trying to go for.

While the players in question are reacting to this quite well, I must say, the 'I don't want to tell you how to RP' angle is incredibly hypocritical here.

Honestly, as another player, I get uncomfortable watching their relationship too. But, really, I have a choice to not read it if I don't want to. And, really, fiction, even RP fiction, is not all sunshine and rainbows. And realistic drama can still entertain without being watered down and fluffed up.

I'm sorry, regardless of your intent, it's coming off as a bit of 'I don't like it, so you need to stop' mentality, when you're probably not playing someone directly affected by it, and have the option of skipping the whole thing.

I got tinglies

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject