rpanons | oh, dreamwidth park is lonely in the dark/all the horny memes have no tag-outs

oh, dreamwidth park is lonely in the dark/all the horny memes have no tag-outs

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100%. regardless of trauma, etc., it's absolutely not acceptable to imply that something's going to be mutually fine and then turn around and unilaterally make it dubcon.

Ayrt- yeah, it's not a trigger of mine, I've written them on occasion even! But I'd be pretty dang annoyed at bare minimum if a scene I was under the impression was consensual is being played as though it was not. It's not unreasonable to want either it to have been clearly a consensual act or retconned out entirely.

+1

it's even worse imho when the other player is going around to other characters and painting your character as a predator or a rapist for their hurt/comfort cr or whatever it is they're doing. so not only do you have to deal with the encounter being assumed to be dubcon or noncon but you also get your cr or your character's rep in the game tanked without your consent.

players who do this ought to be reported to mods. it can be incredibly disruptive to a game experience.

fr op should report it to the mods. this sounds like the other player just wanted to give their character rape trauma and intentionally deceived op. i'd also be interested in knowing who it is so i can avoid them, this shit isn't cool.

i third taking this to the mods. it isn't okay behavior from the other player but also it isn't something you should have to confront them over alone when you aren't comfortable with it

go to the mods, say you guys agreed to one thing and now it's being played as another. you're uncomfortable talking to them now and don't know what to do. ask them if they can talk to the player on your behalf, see if you guys can retcon that it never happened or something

if they have to reach out to players they threaded with to say the thing got retconned, idk. i don't have any sympathy because they chose on their own to take it in this direction and it wasn't fair to you

echoing all the anons saying that this should be taken to the mods. this is not a trigger of mine in any way but if this were to have happened to me in a game, i would also be upset by the deception. this should have been discussed with you beforehand.

+1 tbh it feels like the other player wanted to play a noncon kink scene but knew OP would never agree to it if they were told upfront. So they played it as consensual with OP and nonconsensual with everyone else. That's definitely reportable as a form of boundary evading.

A recurring issue I have with EMP:

I post an ad offering character A, seeking character B. Later, another player posts an ad offering character B, seeking character A.

This should be a clear indicator that the other player is interested and wants a scene with A and B. Instead my brain insists the fact that they posted an ad seeking A/B, but didn't respond to my ad seeking A/B, means that they are avoiding me in particular.

I always make myself power through it and DM the other player anyway and it has never gone poorly for me, but I'm so tried of wrestling with this stupid anxiety every single time.

there you go! i hope you do c: everyone deserves a little cheer this season

shop told me you already have a paid for this journal, so i just sent you the points instead! hope that's alright... regardless, right back at you! happy holidays nonny

i feel you nonny and always feel the same way when this happens, but if it helps: this happens no matter how popular or obscure the canon is. sometimes it's just that someone posted an ad without reading anyone else's and that's it

our brains always want to make more of it than it is though because they are silly things! but i'm rooting for you, may this be another success and the two of you have lots of fun!

aw, that's natural too. it's so easy to dwell, and sometimes in dwelling we lose sight of other important things. like, i'm sure in this year you've also made tons of progress compared to the last one and the one before it, which will help you squat lower next year!

just squat responsibly... no injuries!! and if you like you can always post here about how it's going, i am usually lurking and would love to hear more!

This is extremely horrible of the other player to do. I'd be very put off someone if I knew they treated a partner this way. I think you could disclose that you were under the impression the whole thing was going to be happily consensual, and that the other player never indicated to you they'd be interpreting it as dubcon, without ever having to disclose your own trauma, because what this player is doing isn't acceptable. That said, if you chose not to do this it would be completely understandable as well. I am sorry this happened. Other player is in the wrong, not you.

I didn't have access to therapy when I had my worst friend breakups, but I did do this:

"other than that, i suggest looking up the "no contact rule." it's mostly used for relationships, but it works for friendships too because it's about detoxing and retraining your brain. basically erase any possibility of acknowledging that person for ~90 days (60-90 days being what constitutes a habit for the brain) or longer depending on your needs. don't gossip. don't look at what they're doing. just don't."

And I can confirm it was MASSIVELY helpful to me simply from the fact that I was forced to seek out other things to do, other people to hang out with, and other things to think about. I was still sad about my friend but the no-contact period helped me begin to move on. You will be doing yourself a favor by going cold turkey even if it feels excruciating at first.

i will very often post an ad without reading the ones above mine, and sometimes because there are so many comments that my brain just misses the one where it listed character a/b or because i'm tired and just want to put my ad out there.

i definitely understand the anxiety, but don't let it stop you from reaching out!

AO3 notification in my inbox!!!

...it's a new chapter of the one fic i'm not interested in by an author i'm following

first world problems

have YOU ever wanted to rp a thread that's just hentai bastard doujin but as yuri instead!

looking to play a scenario in which an old, dirty seadog with an appetite for beautiful younger women has sex with said women. i just want to play ahab fucking pretty girls. ahab's manipulative, a little insane, one-track minded and obsessed with killing the whale that ate her leg off. though, i'm more than happy to AU her to fit any sort of scenario needed! she can just be a regular old woman; maybe she lurks around bars, is a bit of a deadbeat etc.

interested in a focus on the massive age difference, as well as how ahab only has the most lecherous intentions. maybe the girl's a little scared and disgusted.

kinks i'm interested in: alcohol or drug use (or both!), dubcon/noncon, strap-ons, large insertions, lots of touching and kissing. i'm very open to most things though, so we can discuss further kinks if you're interested.

i can also play ahab with a cock if you'd prefer.

please pm me here if you want to plan! naturally, i'd like to play the older party. i prefer for the younger party to be over 18. PB preference is drawn or iconless.

Edited 2023-12-12 00:37 (UTC)

is there anything online like the house building tool in the sims games but without... the actual sims

i want to design living spaces for characters and most of the free online room builders i've found are janky in some way and/or use weird, overly fancy designer furniture. i just want to fill a room with normal beds or ugly sofas or whatever in a variety of styles, not $700 desk lamps from whatever company the room designer program is advertising

Looking for sexual wrestling psls. Can be straight up porn being shot, au sex sports, or underground referral only competitions with high value entry prizes and grand prizes. Mostly structured around two rounds with points being earned for dominating, getting the opponent in sexual positions, getting the opponent off and pinning them. Loser gets light bondage and the winner has to get off one final time to receive their prize.

For a porn shoot it can be very WWE over the top acting.

For sports it can be a real competition where they are both experienced (or amateur class).

For the underground referral it can be very shady and unfair. Pays well to enter and the prize is worth competing for even if the weight/size class isn't even close.

Open to it being competitive or either of them winning (even open to her winning by luck in the referral by getting him off and ridding him or straddling his face and getting a pin). Looking to play the guy in this one and open to him going up against a solo competitor, tag team or other scenario. Message

socksfornothing if interested.

I feel like I've noticed a couple schools of thought in my rp acquaintances circle regarding smut rp. Lemme explain them below.

School A does OOC negotiation and establishes what kinks will be included and also what level of consensuality (for lack of a better word) will take place in the scene: consensual, noncon, or dubcon. If the players agree, IC negotiation might take place but also it's fine to basically jump in and go at it with no IC negotiation taking place.

School B incorporates OOC negotiation the same as School A, but also wants/expects IC negotiation to take place in the thread itself. If this doesn't happen, it can discomfit the player involved. I'll admit that this particular example is an anecdote, but I was at one point told about a player who agreed to do a threesome with their character and ended up leaving the scene angry and uncomfortable because the IC negotiation hadn't taken place and they felt a noncon scene had been strung on them.

I'm way more of a School A type of person. My feeling is if we've negotiated on an OOC level what we want out of a scene, including consent level, I'm not really interested in rehashing the same negotiation ICly. It's not necessarily realistic that the characters wouldn't negotiate or discuss what they were going to do, but there's plenty of other unrealistic things about rp smut that mostly just get handwaved away and that doesn't bother me. It has occurred to me lately that I should make this preference clear so that I can either get on the same page with School B people, or so they can opt out in full knowledge of what my preference is.

Would you say you're more School A or School B? Have you run into mismatched expectations from someone from the opposite school? Am I totally talking out of my ass

Points would be lovely. This year has been a nightmare, but I'm glad we're all almost on the other side of it ♥

pick my tag next

pretty please?

+2

the kiss of death for my best psls

Anon I recently had a whiff of this kind of thing happen with someone. It triggered me as well and I immediately confronted the player on it and dropped the thread. It's a shitty thing to do when the kink was meant to be consensual, doubly so if you were expecting enthusiastic consent, especially when kink can be such a sensitive subject in the first place. I think players who pull that kind of thing are too wrapped up in what they can get out of it for their character to stop and think about how it might affect the other person.

If you aren't comfortable talking to the player I echo going to the mods. Spreading it to others in a negative way without clearing it with you is automatically putting your char in situations you didn't ask for, whether intended or not, and that isn't cool. If it's mutual CR being told this stuff maybe talk to those players too? I'm sure they will be more than happy to retcon.

Please don't let this bad experience run you out of the game if you're having fun there otherwise. The other player is at fault here. It has absolutely nothing to do with avoiding IC consequences.

Both. If I can bang them out quickly, comment field. If I need to work on them (like very meaty prose or something emotional I need to be in the right mindset for), or something comes up suddenly IRL, I save them into a word doc for later.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

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oh, dreamwidth park is lonely in the dark/all the horny memes have no tag-outs

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f/f - dirty old woman/pretty young girl, various kinks

SIMS-LIKE ROOM DESIGNER TOOLS

M/F(F/F+) - Sex wrestling, dubcon/consensual, videotaping, exhibition, humiliation, light bondage

Informal Smut RP Poll

Re: ANON HOLIDAY GIFT THREAD

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Re: GENERAL DWRP QUESTIONS