rpanons | give us this day our daily bait

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How many people see nothing wrong with this is really a good example of why there’s so much awkwardness among rpers. I’m not even here to make friends or talk but the sheer amount of rudeness I get from people over basic interactions is because you guys really don’t know how to indulge social platitudes and it shows. Either stop caring about being perceived as an asshole or make the effort, you can’t have both.

personally speaking i've experienced way more awkwardness, rudeness and straight up abuse from people who assume that we're besties because we've have all of 2 threads together. they never actually ask if we're on the same page about being friends but if i have to go and deal with something irl for a few days or i don't treat them how they expect to be treated (again without telling me, they expect me to psychically know what they want) they get pissy or start posting vagueplurks about being "ignored".

i don't care about 90% of the shit my rp friends are doing. i don't care about their problems, i have enough of my own to deal with. i just want to rp. if that makes me an asshole i also don't care, sorry not sorry.

that's not what people are discussing though, it's that op said they don't like to talk to their rp partners and then gave them their discord anyway and were surprised pikachu when the person used it

but op said they didn't like to talk ooc

they said that

by all accounts the other person isn't trying to talk ooc, though. they're talking about the threads they and op are doing. you know, rp.

no i mean - and i think OP meant - they don't like to talk ooc. as in, player-to-player.

"here is my discord if you need it to plot with me, but i don't like to talk ooc"

that means "chat with me sparingly, please"

the boundary is clear imo

the mere fact you're having to say 'i think they mean they don't like to talk player-to-player' to someone who says 'they don't like to talk ooc, as in things that aren't rp' should indicate that the boundary isn't the clearest as different people interpret things differently!

it would be wild of op's entire thing stems from a semantic misunderstanding

yeah see i too would have interpreted 'i don't like to talk ooc' to mean 'i don't want to talk about my life or things that aren't rp-related.' i have plenty of people like that added, we only talk about rp and not about our real lives or our jobs or anything like that. but i would have taken the sharing of the discord to mean they were fine with talking on a daily/near-daily basis because i don't give out my discord name to people i don't want to talk to frequently. i'll add people on plurk left and right but discord is only for people i think i'm going to want to be in regular contact with.

god no that is horrifying to me. i will never casually give out my discord now thanks

it's strange that this is seemingly the first time op has had this problem

I mean discord is a chat program it is even more explicitly a chat program than plurk, and anons bitch all the time about people talking too much on plurk. The main advantage discord has over PMs is that it makes it easier to chat and have real conversations because it updates in real time, that's why some anons are confused that OP didn't just stick to PMs because they don't want conversation at all.

i am equally confused that giving someone my discord explicitly "for plotting" is implicit permission to ping me with daily chatter about threads, and i can't be the only one? seems like we'd all benefit from being more precise about our preferences

For some people chatting leads to plotting, like I say "Dean Winchester is going to get big mad at what Goku just did in that last tag" and then you say potential directions Goku's angry reaction can go in. Some rpers don't like this sort of ooc plotting either and that's okay too. I really doubt the partner is a deliberately duplicitous discord snake like some anons are implying, Hanlon's Razor is a thing and they probably just assumed the former style of plotting was alright.

And agreed.

DEAN'S angry reaction I messed up my own analogy

agreed re: being more precise about preferences.

i mean, op said "for plotting and what happens next with our characters". we don't actually know what op means when they say their thread partner is 'gushing' about their threads - are they enthusiastically talking about tags? writing styles? or are they talking about character actions and how bob reacted to sam and how GOSH sam's going to react this way!!! because, frankly, 'what happens next with our characters' is quite vague and IME some people find that conversation can stem from talking about where the thread is currently.

this honestly reads like op thought they were clear and they either weren't or they were misunderstood for another reason, and op hasn't clarified to them that woah, wait a minute, this isn't what they meant.

Yes, that's what I meant. I don't like to talk player to player.

"i dont like to talk player to player, but here is where you can talk to me player to player"

i dont know what you expected

this whole subthread blew up a lot more than i expected when i was asleep, oops

"you're kind of an asshole" was a little extreme on my end, i can own that, but after reading through all this it's pretty clear that OP wasn't as clear as they thought they were in establishing a boundary and probably shouldn't have given out their discord from the start

'i don't like talking player to player' also makes them sound sorta joyless in this context but that's just imo and i doubt our paths would ever cross so whatever floats their incommunicado boat i guess

give us this day our daily bait

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