rpanons | Don't bother

Don't bother

Rundown:

rpanons is an anonymous community for role-play related topics. This place serves as a forum for game discussions, canon discussions, RP solicitations (ATP, game ads, open memes), and advice. The occasional off topic comment is inevitable, but please keep heated social and political topics to their respective communities. Posting them here will only get them frozen. Subsequent threads made to bypass a freeze will then be deleted.

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what are you hoping to get out of this thread?

...what do you mean? A lot of people don't understand the disorders, and why/what our thought process is in suffering from it. What triggers it, how difficult it is to recover, etc.

I'm not looking for a support group, I'm here to answer questions about the disorder.

from what i usually see, people post what they do on these threads, or things they identify as. essentially, to disseminate information about an interesting identity with misconceptions, which might otherwise be misrepresented.

anorexia and bulimia are obviously disorders and i don't see a lot of concern over their getting represented at all. that leaves your audience as people with morbid curiosity and fellow sufferers.

pretty much i was just curious why you'd take questions about something so unhealthy.

Honestly? I don't see an issue with the morbidly curious. And if fellow suffers want to talk, I don't see that as a bad thing.

And it is unhealthy (as is OCD which is above this comment). But I also think it should be talked about.

i'll politely disagree and bow out here. i realize i'm biased and reading a lot into few words, but your title didn't frame it as recovering, but as a current condition for you. i feel like just discussing it normalizes it, and makes it a disorder that's easier to bear because, after all, other people do the same thing.

but yeah, obviously a personal view. carry on.

I guess we shouldn't talk about any mental illness, then, because it ~normalizes~ it.

Talking about it helps, Jesus Christ. What do you think therapy is? It's not just shoving food down someone's throat until they get over it.

sorry op, obviously i said i'd bow out, but i want to clarify here: when i say talking about it, i mean to a bunch of strangers in an environment where people are much more prone to being judgmental and vicious. therapy is good, but therapy is not the same as an anon comm, even if the anon on the other end is in a similar predicament.

if op seeks help in therapy, that's great, but imo the odds that two anorexics are going to get together and talk about how to seek help are low.

and now i'm gone!

from another recovered anorexic to an internet stranger: it's none of your business how ~delicate~ someone's condition might be to anons. dude fuck off

your issue with this thread is weird. we've had ed anons in "ask a" threads before. it's a prevalent disorder with A LOT of misconceptions. talking about it on anons (as with any serious topic) will more likely get genuine questions unless the trollier anons are bored.

idk why so many of you think anons is a vicious danger zone for sensitive subjects. the trolls aren't that prevalent and when they come out they're blaringly obvious.

why are you picking on this one anon in particular, go away

lmao

i've seen some skin picking/hair plucking threads and that's not healthy behavior either

i have a friend with an ed caused by an irrational fear of choking. he's lost so much weight he can't do sports any more until he gains some. he's very unhealthy and down 50-60 pounds. he's considering admitting himself to hospital, but isn't sure of his other options. do you have any thoughts? i really don't know much about this sort of thing as i cant fathom why someone wouldnt eat (i'm the opposite and binge eat) but i want to offer sound advice.

I actually knew someone like this, as well. He would chew every bite of food like 10-20 times to make sure it was small enough that he wouldn't choke.

And honesty? A hospital and/or inpatient therapy might be the best option for him. A lot of EDs come from an issue with food, but his is something different (the whole choking issue). Until he can get into that, I would suggest that he try to consume high protein shakes and other liquid nourishment to attempt to keep him from losing more weight. A lot of those protein powders/etc have okish (not the best but we are trying to keep him from losing more weight) nutrition. If he is scared/phobic of even shakes, then even more reason that he needs to get himself checked into a place.

I hope this helps. It's definitely a unique situation, but intensive therapy is his best viable option.

not that anon, but he needs exposure therapy as well as something high in calories to sustain him while he works on it, there are liquid meal replacements and stuff

hydration will help him a lot. the more dry something is, the easier it is to choke on it, so maybe if he drinks with a glass of water and possibly takes a sip with every bite, that could help him feel safer? also stuff that's a p soft texture but not liquid (pudding/yogurt would be kind of thick and might trigger the fear but like well-cooked vegetables and deli meats come to mind)

i have a friend who binges and purges. she's admitted that she has a lot of difficulty controlling it and seems to be really overwhelmed and upset by it, but refuses to get professional help and insists that she can stop by herself, even while admitting that she can't. i'm extremely worried about her, but suggesting that she talk to a therapist causes friction in our friendship, no matter how i put it.

i dont want to abandon her as a friend, but i dont want to stand around and enable what she's doing, either. what is the best thing i can do to help her?

It took me years to admit that I had a problem, and to put a name to it. I'm in recovery right now, and going to therapy on the regular. It's a scary thing, to admit that you are so out of control you need others to help pull you out. And most EDs come from a desire to control.

And let me say right now--you are a good friend for attempting to help her. But this is a hard one. For yourself, I would suggest you call a hotline to ask for their advice--often they deal with people's families who struggle in the same situation you have, and they have training that is catered to help you come to the right conclusion.

Some small ways to provide support--try to avoid going out to eat (do things that don't revolve around food...eating out, even while I like hanging with my friends and eating good food, can still trigger me sometimes), and if you are hanging out with her inside, try to distract her if she starts getting into food. Again--a good way to support is try to find ways to remove the food aspect from interactions.

Bottom line though, providing her support is important, but if she refuses to get help for herself, and becomes hostile when you bring up supporting her in gaining that help, you may need to cut off ties. Explain to her why you can't maintain close ties, and if she ever decides to get help, you will fully support her. It sounds like the friendship is having a stressful/toxic effect on you, as well. Your mental health should come first.

I'm sorry I don't have a better answer for you.

tell her she has to choose between your friendship and her disorder. get help or you walk. i had this happen with an ex of mine and that was the only thing that got her to seek help. i get not wanting to abandon her, but if she's refusing to get help while knowing she needs it then sticking around is just going to enable her.

i know it sucks, and she's putting you in an extremely shitty situation, but assuming you're both adults, you can't stand between her and harm if she's determined to harm herself. you can fight with someone and for someone, but you can't fight against someone, you know? they have to be willing to be helped.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Don't bother

Person with Anorexia Nervosa/Bulimia

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