Yeah, that's definitely a part of it. It feels horrible saying "I'm worried it reflects poorly on me," but people do notice this kind of thing, and it's contributing to the unhappy vibe. I know my own activity is lagging because of their absence, and I wonder if it wouldn't be best to just drop. I don't see it getting better, and I don't want to end up in a situation where I resent a friend for it. Having an invested castmate is important to me, and it's emotionally exhausting to get the wind knocked out of my sails again and again.